Dena Recommends part deaux

Diapers.com

If you know me fairly well, you know I am a bargain hunter. I come by it honestly, since my mom is this way, except 100x better. She could talk a homeless person out of their only shoes. not that she would. but I digress.

In my quest to find the cheapest possible place for diapers, I searched high and low. In store and online. Including places like ebay, amazon.com, alice.com, sams club, babies r us, walmart, target, grocery stores, drug stores, etc etc etc. Diapers.com is the cheapest place I have found. You can even mail in coupons and they will apply them to your account to use. They offer free 2-day shipping (for orders over 49$, which isn't hard), and in most states (mine included) have NO tax. Holla!!!! I buy the biggest cases of diapers since that also provides a lower cost-per-diaper option.

Also, they have incredible customer service. AWESOME. I'll tell you of my experience with them. I once ordered a product, got it, didn't like it, and emailed them asking to return it. I got a reply back saying they were sending a replacement. They had misunderstood that I wanted my money back, not a new one. I let them know this, and they refunded my money, and I ended up with two of the product for free that they encouraged me to pass onto someone in need to try it out. How lovely. Second issue with customer service: I ordered some diapers that were suppposed to get here right before christmas time, before we left to drive to IL. It didn't get here the day it was supposed to, and the next shippable (i made up a word, i think) business day is when we were leaving, EARLY in the morning to head out. I called diapers.com and told them of the dilemma. They were so nice and so helpful, and told me they were going to freeze the diapers coming to our house, have them returned to diapers.com while still in transit, and the diapers would be sent to IL to my in-laws immediately. We brought enough diapers for 1 day, and had the rest we needed for our nearly 2 week stay when we arrived in IL, the following day. Issue within the issue: I was having 2 boxes shipped to our house, cause thats how we would qualify for free shipping. But we only needed 1 box for the trip. So they just sent 1 box to IL for us instead of 2. Side issue: when we got home from our IL/KS trip, the original order of diapers had ended up at our house, instead of being rerouted back to diapers.com like they planned. I called diapers.com, told them, and let them know they needed to charge my card for them since they were at my house. I didn't mind, i'd use them soon enough, anyway. But instead, they only charged me for 1 box instead of two, and I got a $34 I think) box of huggies for FREEEEE!

Oh yes.

Also, did I mention you can get $10 off your first order of diapers from them? If you sign up, use this, my referral code, to get it: YXUC8749 . Also, if you use that code, I get perks for "referring you," as well. double woo hoo.

also, they have the cheapest or at least competitive prices for lots of other things there, too. Like bath products, cloth dipes, wipes, feeding products, toys, clothes, nursing gear, cleaning supplies, etc etc etc. They have ALL sorts of brands. And they will price match. And they often have percentages off stuff. They're awesome.

Basically, if you're not buying your (name brand) diapers from diapers.com, you're either wasting your money, or I want to know where you're getting them cheaper. :) (Of course, they don't sell store brands of diapers.)

I think thats all for now!!!

Dena Recommends

At the risk of this being really lame, I'm thinking of starting a theme called "Dena recommends." I often think of things I really love and want to recommend to people, and maybe this will organize my thoughts enough to help me blog more. Who knows. So, let us begin.

Dena recommends:

California Baby Products. ( www.californiababy.com is the homesite, but I mostly buy from diapers.com , a site I intend to rave about at a later time.)
Why do I love them? Let me count the ways...
* a lot of their products are given pretty much the best rating possible on www.cosmeticdatabase.com for baby products, in the way of least allergenic and most safe" ingredients....
* also, its the only thing we've found in the way of put-on-your-skin that won't give Oliver a rash.
* And it smells nice.
* Its more concentrated and you can use less than other products with it working well

We use the following products, currently:
*calming baby wash/shampoo http://californiababy.com/calming-shampoo-bodywash-17-5-oz.html - Oliver's shampoo and body wash
*Calming Diaper Rash Cream http://californiababy.com/calming-diaper-rash-cream-2-9-oz.html - we hardly ever have to use diaper cream, but this stuff is great. This appealed to me because you probably know of our Thrush sagas, and Oliver would end up with it (yeast infection) on his bottom a few times from it going through his system from his mouth to him bum. This product has tea tree oil in it, known to naturally fight yeast.
*Calming Non-Talc Powder - This also appealed to me for its anti-fungal (yeast) tea tree properties, as spoken of above. And it gave a dry option for the bum, as opposed to extra moisture, which could possible exacerbate any hiney issues.
*super sensitive everyday lotion http://californiababy.com/super-sensitive-everyday-lotion-6-5-oz.html -- we recently got this to put on Oliver's knees that were feeling only a little dry. I put it on only once in a while -- did I mention he has really well-balanced skin? I think part of the reason is because the wash and shampoo we use doesn't strip his skin to need lots of extra moisturizers put on.
*No Fragrance SPF 30+ Sunscreen - this is fantastic -- it gets rave reviews on cosmeticdatabase.com , and it really really really really works. And it didn't make Oliver have a rash like the other sunscreen we tried. After reading all the garbage that is put in other sunscreens thats really bad for you and even increases sunburns, I am so happy this exists! Next time I'm in the sun, I intend to use it on myself.
*callendula cream http://californiababy.com/calendula-cream-2-oz.html -this cleared up the exema that sometimes flares up on my hand as SOON as I put it on when it reared its ugly head for the first time this winter, and hasn't come back -- this is huge -- I normally have to go at least several weeks trying to find something that will somewhat help while mostly just waiting the exema out to go away on its own for a while before reappearing
*aloe vera cream http://californiababy.com/aloe-vera-cream-2-oz.html - We've used this on scrapes on Oliver's skin
*Tea Tree and Lavendar Body Wash and Shampoo http://californiababy.com/tea-tree-lavender-shampoo-bodywash-8-5-oz.html -- this product is for me. I use it! I got this in the midst of my nursing-related thrush mess (since tea tree oil is known to fight yeast/thrush/fungus)
*Calming Diaper Area Wash http://californiababy.com/non-burning-calming-diaper-area-wash-6-5-oz.html - since we don't use baby wipes (I might get to that in another post), this is excellent to have on hand for the messy diapers. After a preliminary wipe with the wet washrag, I spray this a few timess on Oliver's bum, and it helps everything unstick and helps put some good moisture back in his skin. After the bottle runs out, I'm going to refill it with a "recipe" I found online that calls for a bit of baby wash (Cali. Baby, of course) and water. I imagine that will work great, too, we'll see.

They have a slew of other great products. Look around. You've probably noticed it seems kind of pricey. And it is. But, their products are more concentrated, they actually do what they're supposed to as well as work proactively in many ways, and its the only stuff we've found that keeps Oliver rash free, not to mention the fact that they don't have harmful chemicals and such in their items. Who wouldn't be willing to pay a bit more for something that is more likely to work the first time instead of wasting money switching products and dealing with the hassle of skin-related issues that could have been prevented in the first place? The Sunscreen is especially pricey (I will tell you a secret, we got a really good deal (relatively speaking) on some when we bought several bottles of it at once from a seller on Ebay (new, of course) Try it, and save a mint), but it actually WORKS. We don't get out in the sun very often, so this is not a big deal, especially for that reason.

Bottom line: I really just can't say enough good stuff about this line. A woman in Babies R Us who was shopping for a shower gift asked me about bath products the other week, and I went on freak-out about how awesome California Baby products are. You can ask my mom. She was there. Lady probably really regretted asking me, I just kept talking about them. Ha. I should get paid for this stuff, really. I would recommend this stuff to anyone, but especially to people having any sort of skin issue and also to new moms and dads. Its a great product to start out with that is truly gentle without having to switch after getting the baby home only to find out something is making your baby rashy. If money were no object, I'd pretty much buy every single item they sell, just to try it out and have it on hand. I intend to try other products in their line as need calls for it.

I hope you've enjoyed this episode of "Recommendations from Dena" and all my run-on sentences and parentheses within parentheses.

A new year, a new start, perhaps?

Hi. We're still alive. I will get right to it instead of going into my usual tale of why I only blog once every 2.4 years. I'll keep it really simple, too. Please excuse the straightforwardness. Its just easier this way.

1) For a myriad (yes, really, a myriad) of reasons, I can't really say more than this, but Andrew resigned from his position as Pastor here. And well, like I said, that is the end of the public version of the story. His last day to preach was at the end of January. If we haven't talked in awhile, you're probably thinking you're really out of the loop and that this is really sudden, but believe me, this was incredibly sudden for us, too, so don't feel too left out. We have no more than 5.5 months from now that we can possibly still live here in the manse (and have severance) before we HAVE to move out. Right now, we're trying to figure out what the next step is. Andrew has been applying to PCA and OPC churches for Pastor/Assistant Pastor positions. We're hoping and praying the Lord opens something up in that way of things, but we know that that can take a very long time (usually does, in fact), even for someone older and with more than 1.5 years of pastoring experience. In the meantime, we're trying to wrap our heads around this life change and figure out what is best to do for now. Move to Jackson (realistically, the only place to find work, which is 1.5 hours away, one way) for Andrew to get some sort of job? Have Andrew commute to Jackson to work, x number of days per week with us still living in Tchula? Will I come with him to Jackson when he goes to work so I won't be here by myself and the baby for long stretches, at night, etc? Some combination of these things? We're trying to figure out what makes the most sense financially, for safety reasons, etc etc etc. So. That's enough about that. Prayers are appreciated.

2) Oliver is pretty much awesome. I love him. We love him. Hes still super cute and amazing and such a blessing and I still have no idea how I lived without him until he was born. He just turned 9 months old. Hes so busy. Hes crawling all over the place, doing a lot of pulling up and standing while holding onto stuff, etc. Hes exploring everything.

3) I love La Leache League. Living in a small town with nothing to do here, LLL meetings are my hobby, I guess, every month. Is that sad? Lol. I mean, not "is it sad" in that it is a bad hobby to have, but is it sad that that is really my only go-out-and-so-something hobby? Oh well. I don't really mind. Back to LLL, this ties in with my ... how do I say this the right way?...complete amazement with and commitment to a whole lifestyle of nourishing and parenting my baby. The more I study, read, learn, hear, etc about breastfeeding and attachment parenting and feeding my child healthy foods and things of that nature that somehow all tie in together, the more I just want to yell from the rooftops and help other people in their struggles to breastfeed or nuture their children in what I believe is the most normal, loving and intuitive way possible. That probably didn't make any sense. -- Like-mindedness for all those things converge at LLL meetings, and its beautiful. -- I'm horrible with words. This is probably why I don't blog more often. Well, one reason. Sorry.

4) Pictures just don't get posted here, sorry. If you follow me on facebook, you will see plenty of Oliver pictures, there. I am usually behind on posting pictures. For instance, right now, I have a plethora of pics to post, but got stopped at late December.

5) I'm not done with taxes. Why, you ask? Well, I will just give you one reason. I like to blame it on the fact that our taxes are really involved since we have tons of itemized things, deductions and such, to show separately. We got this huge form from our tax guy to list everything in, and seriously, I don't understand half of it, at least. Apparently, if I don't have something to show for a category, I still have to put a zero or a dash or something else I forget in the line, and every time I look at it, I'm like, 'should I list this here, or here?' or 'What in the dickens does this mean?' Or, 'does this mean what I think it means, or something else?' Every time I sit down to try to work on it, I look at the form - its actually a stapled-together booklet - and totally freak out. I just want to call our tax guy and say, "yeah, about that form...can I just give you all the numbers I have in language I understand and you can make sense of them?" And that's pretty much the end of me working on taxes, because at that point, my head has exploded and I've had a nervous break down. Andrew keeps asking me if I have the taxes done. Its looming over my head like a black cloud. Just typing this about it makes me want to hide. So we're moving on. I lied, I am going to give you another reason. I usually can only sit down and get anything done, interrupted, for a total of...maybe ....3 minutes, before Oliver beckons me in some form or other. You know, because he is going to knock something over, or hes had enough of his jumperoo, or sitting him in his crib to play so I can work on taxes leads to much hollering and I just can't concentrate with that going, or hes with Daddy, but its not going so well with Daddy and I can't concentrate with Oliver fussing loudly....except for times like this, late at night...when really, I should be sleeping, because Oliver is sleeping, and he still wakes up a LOT (you may send hate mail regarding any sleep training need to idonotwanttohearit@gmail.com)during the night to nurse, and you know me, and I need a LOT of sleep to function at a semi-normal level, so...where was I....point was, i could be working on taxes now, except I need to go to bed...or unwind because I need some ME time.

6) I know you think I'm such a whiner. Which leads me to my next thing of I am THAT mom who is not even remotely ready to even think of having another child. Yes. I am THAT woman. You might be thinking, 'wait, didn't you just say Oliver is only 9 months old, who said anything about you having to have more kids yet?' But lets be honest. At this point, its not unusual for people to think of the idea. I LOVE being Oliver's mom, and love every hard, sleep-deprived minute of it. But I know I am nowhere near ready to even have the idea enter my head of more children any time soon. Except when that idea is closely followed by, 'Oh sweet fancy moses, I would die.' I am amazed because I know so many women, currently, or throughout life who seem to rebound very quickly after having children to be "ready" to have another child. Not that anyone is every "ready." But. You know what I mean. Able to function. And I am realizing (actually, I've known this so far in), I am just not anywhere close to being there yet. I am savoring my days with my baby boy.

I always feel like my posts are really just...dumb. I think I come across all wrong. Oh well.

No time to blog, really, but just wanted to share a link.

Oliver is 8 months old today. Too crazy. He is crawling and just starting to pull himself up into a standing position from a seated or crawling position (I think today may have been the first time) using objects to help him (while still holding on, of course). My baby!

We had a wonderful 12 days or so of traveling back (driving) to IL and to KC to visit our families. It was suburb. And it snowed. Quite a bit. Hooray.

Maybe someday I'll find time to blog. And post pictures. Until then, I'm off to work on finances/taxes and take care of my baby.

Nearly 5 months old

I figure a post is seriously in order. I figure I can post right now without feeling too guilty since I am at Buddy and Frenchie's with nothing to do except do my nightly routine and sleep (which I should probably do now/soon since I have an early dr's appt tomorrow morning, hince why I am here).

Oliver will be 5 months old in a few days. WHAT?! Crazy. He weighs over 16 lbs, is nearly out of all of his 3-6 and 6 month clothes and we just put him in his first size 3 diaper today.

Family and friends who are reading this, I feel so sorry that our family updates are so few and far between, especially since this is primarily how most of you get a chance to catch up with us. I just really struggle with getting the daily grind done (I never do get caught up), so sitting down long enough to type everything out just isn't feasable.

About me: I continue to battle thrush and/or staff infections from nursing. They continue to get better, I think, but it has truly been like a two steps forward 1.9 steps back ordeal. I have done or am doing every treatment in the book, as far as I know, both with traditional meds RX and OTC as well as herbal/homeopathic, with the exception of eliminating all sugars/carbs (read: i could literally only eat meat and a few certain veggies) from my diet...which at this point, I'd rather just live with the pain. Very trying, emotionally as well as physically...and spiritually. I am thankful, though, that I am still able to nurse my baby. I would be devastated if I could not.

The hardest part of having a baby, for me, has been lack of sleep. Most people who know me know that I have always required more sleep than the average person. --Quite a lot more sleep than the average person, even, to function. I don't really know why this is, but its a real thing. I recently had my thyroid tested just to see if there were any issues there that would explain my lethargy/sleepiness, but it came back clear. The next step is to have a sleep study. I'm not sure that I can do one at this point, though, since I am nursing around the clock. I need to call the sleep study center and ask just to be sure, though. Anyway, obviously, the sleep issue is greatly exacerbated by having a baby...particularly since I am nursing and the weight of getting up with baby so he can eat falls 100% on me. I am happy to do it, I LOVE my child, etc, but it has been immensely difficult just to function. All principles finally went out the window about a month ago when I decided sleep was more important, and I've started just pulling Oliver into bed with us at some point during the night so that I can nurse him laying down and semi-snooze and then fall right back asleep. The not getting out of bed a million times/standing to change a diaper, etc, has greatly helped. I still don't get "enough" sleep at night, even for the average person, which means I don't get enough sleep especially for what I require, but it is certainly better than the up down up down up down 20 x charade. I can usually make it up once at night to nurse and lay him back down, but that is the peak of my coping level. After that, into the bed he comes. And the more I read about babies and sleep, the more OK I am with this, regardless of former principles. Please continue to pray for us when you think of it, that what rest I do get would be restful and revitilizing.

Another thing that has been harder than I had prepared myself for was all of the well-meaning advice. Everyone loves us and in caring for us wants to offer their bit of advice to help out. Of course, this often means not following the advice of great-intentioned loved ones. Listening to loved ones and then educating myself and then making final decisions for what works for us and standing my ground in it has been key. I find myself researching, researching, researching. This has been wonderful, although hard. I feel good about decisions that are made once I really look into things from difference perspectives. Which is a good thing.

I feel like I talk about the hard things a lot. That is only because those are the serious things I feel the need to be honest about. Everything light-hearted and wonderful doesn't take up nearly as much time to talk about. :) Its a little like the News - they usually report the bad. So let me tell you how much I love being a mother. -- I love it. This is 100% what I was cut out to do. It is true, I often find myself checking myself, thinking on my LORD to see if I pay Him as much mind and affection as I do my child. I dare not say the answer to that question. I hear this is a common thing for parents. So I will press on to re-order my priorities.

Oliver is such a joy. This week he started making "bbbbbmmmmbbbbmmm" sounds while "talking." Basically, buzzing his lips. This is a fun new sound for him. The first sound he started "talking" with was "Ohhhh...Ohhh....OOOOOHhhhh." He loves talking to walls and ceiling fans and the dresser and window blinds and the nursing pad boxes (with baby faces on them), in particular. In the last week or so, he has figured out how to pull down the dangling toy that hangs from the car seat handle. This is a feat, since it takes a bit of muscle (for him, I imagine) to pull hard enough to make the pully sysetm work, and then the toy goes rattling back up on its bungee. Oh, it gives him big thrills. For several weeks now, he has been pulling his paci out of his mouth, and trying to stick it back in his mouth. This keeps him entertained for a very long time. He'll get it all sorts of turned around. He is getting better at being successful, though. As soon as he gets it in his mouth, he pulls it right back out to keep doing it over and over. He'll keep at this, usually, until he gets mad because he can't consistantly get it put in his mouth correctly. And don't DARE try to help him, because that just makes him more mad! We have a little sinner on our hands! He started rolling over, both directions (in the same day) when he was about 4 months and 1 week old. He loves to smile and laugh. Oh, how I love his belly laughs. He is still a complete mama's boy. :)

I can't believe Oliver will be starting foods soon, in a month or so! Doesn't seem possible. We need to buy a high chair!


Well, he is making sounds in his sleep like hes about to wake up, so I better go for now!
Maybe next time I'll write about my last-minute trip back home to KC with Mom and Dad last month. :)

When the Wife is Away, the Men will Sit Outside

Dena is away this week visiting family in Kansas and Missouri. So Bruce and I are bachelors.



Things are always exciting when the wife leaves. This time our cat had kittens again. Six this time. Here she is, although you can only see a couple there, there are six.

Yes, we're alive

Wow, its been a while!

I apologize in advance for the serious run-ons, punctuation errors, spelling errors and many ellipses, etc that you’re about to see.

As you can imagine (or not only imagine, as most of you have been there done that), life with a baby is crazy/busy. I don't really feel like I have time to post on here. Or rather, there is always something else to be done, and I usually feel too guilty to take the time to think about updating the blog because everything else continues to pile up. And when i am sitting down at the computer, it is usually when Oliver is needing to be held (which is quite a bit, still), and that just isn't conducive to typing, but rather, browsing/surfing/reading online, etc...things that don't require much typing.

Lets try to recap, shall we?

Disclaimer, below is the rated PG version of Oliver's birthday. Nothing too graphic, but if you're a man, you might just want to skip over this part.

Oliver was born Wednesday 5/6/09. The short version (actually, not short at all) of the story goes like this: I woke up in the middle of the night 9 days before Oliver's estimated due date and heard our cat (outdoor cat for rodent control since we live in the middle of farming fields) making strange noises, and I wondered if she was having babies since Andrew thought she was pregnant. A couple/few hours later, at 6:30 AM, I got up to make one of my 50 million nightly pregnancy bathroom trips. I got back in bed afterwards, was getting all adjusted with my pillows, and I felt a gush. I was like "OH MY GOODNESS," and flipped on the light real quick. Andrew says, "What are you doing?" I say, "I think my water just broke!" and he says "Does that require turning the light on?!" (gotta love Andrew for coming up with this one. hehe) and I'm like, "YES!!!!!!" Soooooooo...I wasn't really sure that my water broke for sure (because I've never done this before) and I thought, 'Oh dear me...what If I've tinkled on myself (it happens to pregnant women sometimes, you know).' So I waddled/ran into the bathroom again, trying not to get anything on the floor on the way and proceeded to somehow break the toilet seat when I sat on it. Hahaha...So after a while (I'll spare you further details), I figured out, it definitely had to be my water breaking. By this point, Andrew was up, starting to get stuff done, just in case, and I let him know THIS WAS IT! IT IS GO TIME! (I didn't say that.) So I sit there and call the dr's office and get the after hour's number, and call the person who takes the after hours calls. I left a VM for her to call me back, letting her know what had happened. I knew they were going to want me to come in, anyway, but I knew I needed to let them know what was happening. Then I called Carol Ann, our doula (plug for hiring a doula/hiring Carol Ann if you're in the Jackson area!) and let her know what was going on. Then I called Frenchie and told her we were hopefully having a baby today. Around this time, we started having THE storm of the spring. It started raining and got progressively worse. I took a shower and started getting ready. I wanted Andrew to update on FB what was happening, but we realized our satellite internet was out, due to the storm. While I'm getting ready, Andrew is packing up the car with our one million bags and items to take to the hospital, and all of Bruce's (our dog) stuff. We had made a list of last-minute items we needed to make sure we had, and it was saved on the computer. Except around this point, the storm got so bad THE POWER WENT OUT. oh yes. So we're trying to figure out what was on the list so we didn't forget anything. And Andrew has to come into the bathroom, shining the mag lite on me so that I could see to do my makeup and hair (yes, I did this). Eventually, it started to get light out enough so that I could see to finish getting ready with no holding of the mag lite. Meanwhile, Andrew is coming to the door of the bathroom every 2 minutes (Andrew doesn't remember it quite this way, but this is what it felt like to me, and its funny), to frantically ask me if I'm ready yet. (We did still have another 1.5 hrs drive into Jackson and still had to drop Bruce off and get some food before going to the dr's office.) About the 10th time, I informed him that if he did not calm down, I was going to start panicking, and this was not the day for me getting all upset. So finally, probably about 8 am or so (give or take), we were both ready to go. As I'm walking out the door, I notice that Delilah has indeed, had a kitten. At this point, Andrew is pretty much willing me into the car with the whooshing of his arms (the car is running, door is open, etc), but I bend down to look at the newborn kitten. Andrew was all, "DENA. THIS IS NOT THE TIME. GET IN THE CAR!" hehe. such fun memories, looking back. Later, when Oliver was born, I held him for the first time and explained to him that he had had a very busy day: Delilah had a kitten, mama broke the toilet seat, and the power went out in the biggest storm we had seen since moving to Tchula, all while he was trying to come out into the world. So we drive to Jackson, and I make approximately 49 phone calls to family, friends, and members of the church. It was especially fun calling Bubby and Mom and Dad. Each of their reactions was so true to their individual personalities and was just so fun. Bub and Mom and Dad headed down this direction a bit after I called and let them know things were happening. At this point, I was only feeling mildly crampy, nothing I considered true contractions at that point. So we dropped Bruce off at Buddy and Frenchie's and then went to Burger King for breakfast. My entire pregnancy, one of my hang ups was the fact that I knew I was not going to be allowed to eat once I was admitted to the hospital, until Oliver was born. I generally do not do well at all with the whole no eating thing, so I was determined to fill up before checking into the hospital. (I did not regret doing so later). We went to the dr's office, and by this point, I was having some pretty serious crampy type feelings. Dr. Bush was able to see me pretty much immediately, and she said that I had a tiny bit of water left, and that she'd break the rest of it once I got checked into my hospital room. I think I was 2 cms dilated when she checked me. So we went downstairs and got all checked in. We signed some papers at the desk, and at this point, I was "dancing" (as the nurse told me) with the crampy type feelings, (which were contractions, but I had never done this before, and at this time they felt like pretty serious cramps). Got into my room and into a gown. Its kind of amazing, because from that point on, things just took off. I am SO glad we got to the hospital when we did, even though I had wanted to be able to labor as long as possible at Buddy and Frenchie's....I can not imagine getting into a car and dealing with the contractions that started coming. Our nurse, Suzanne, was pretty much amazing. She was like a second doula. She was right by our side, almost constantly. Shortly after checking in, (which was at 10 something or 11 something, I guess, she was like "Uhhhh...have you called Carol Ann yet?" "No." "I think you should." (I'm so glad she sensed I was going to need the support, and not a minute too soon.) Yada Yada Yada, contraction, contraction, contraction..... Things went from feeling zeroish to 60 MPH in the blink of an eye, it was pretty overwhelming. I was going to try to walk with my labor as much as possible, to work with it and help labor do its thing as efficiently as possible. By the time Carol Ann got there, I was in serious serious pain. I had horrendous back labor. HORRENDOUS. When a contraction would hit, I would just hang off of Andrew. I think when Carol Ann got there, which was soon (I couldn't even greet her, I was at that point in labor), I was on my hands and knees in bed. Then I stood up for a while longer and swayed and dipped down with the contractions, and Carol Ann supported my weight from the back while I leaned over the bed a little. The pressure in my back and bottom was just amazing (in a not good way). I kept telling them I felt like my bones were exploding. Thats really what it felt like..Except, it was like a contained explosion, where the full force is there, but there is no place for it to explode to...if you can imagine that. (If you've had back labor, you don't have to imagine it!) I got to a point where my legs gave out, and I had to lay down...except laying down even hurt. Everything hurt. Really bad. But the least painful thing, I guess, was laying on my side, holding onto the bed rail for dear life during a contraction, and laying in exhaustion for the few seconds between contractions. My intent was to try to have a natural birth with no meds, but I was asking for help (for some meds of some sort). Andrew, Carol Ann and Suzanne did their best coaching and encouraging to talk me through contractions without meds...Finally, they gave me a small dose of Stadol....oh sweet relief (comparatively.) It only lasts about 20 minutes or so, and it doesn't take the pain away, but you just feel too intoxicated to care as much, kind of...it relaxed me enough between contractions to where I'd kind of go in a sleepy haze...but definitely not enough time to actually sleep....My contractions felt like they never fully went away in between contractions...there was just less pain or more pain. I ended up having three small doses of Stadol over the period of a few/several hours, I'd guess (I have no sense of time during all of this). I was very hot and was thankful we brought a little fan with us. Later I found out (each room has its own temp. control), they had the temp turned down so low for me, that Carol Ann, Andrew and the nurses, etc were FREEZING....I had no idea...I was steaming sweating hot. Sometime in here, Dr. Bush came in and broke the rest of my water, and had me push (I had no idea they would have you do this) to try to dilate a bit more. Oh, the pain. After that, I was like "I don't want to push anymore (until its time for him to be born)!" More labor, more pain, more weepy Dena, asking for help. Every time I'd start crying, they'd encourage me not to cry because they knew I was going to work myself up and it was going to make it hurt more. Oh, it was so hard not to cry. But I realized, too, that I didn't have the energy to put into crying, I needed all the energy my body could muster into just getting through the contractions. Crying and having contractions was horrible. It was like a vicious cycle. Oh, the pain, I need to cry. But crying makes it hurt more. Hurting more makes me cry. Ai ai ai. Heather and Traci came by and I couldn't see them because I was in too much pain and the thought of them coming in the room was too overwhelming for me. They got to see Andrew for a min. in the hall, though. So sweet of them to drive all the way to Jackson. Then I started dry heaving at 6 Cms. That was fun. (Not.) But I know it helped me dilate more! Then I stalled at 7 Cms for several/a few hours, I think (again, no real sense of time, here.) They started me on Pitocin at this time, even though I was adamant I didn’t want it, they were convinced I had to have it (still don’t know all the details of this, I was so out of it.) Eventually, I was serious enough about having the epidural, which coincided very closely with the start of the Pit. I just couldn't do it anymore. Someone, I don't remember if it was Andrew or Carol Ann or Suzanne, told me, "Listen to me, Dena, (something or other about keep going, you're doing great, you don't have to have the epidural)," and I weepily told whoever it was, "No YOU listen to ME: I am in serious pain and I need help, and I'm NOT kidding." They kept asking me if I was sure I wanted the epidural, and I kept saying yes, so they called the man to come do the epidural, but first, Suzanne, while trying to talk me out of it told me that in order for him to administer the epi., I was going to have to sit on the edge of the bed, and I couldn't sit on my bottom let alone sit still enough for the epidural. I kind of panicked when she told me this and told her, "NO. I KNOW they can do the epidural with me laying on my side. Don't tell me he can't do it. I know they can do it that way!" And then she told me he was going to come in and he'd have to check out my back (I don't fully understand this) to see if he'd be able to do it with me laying on my side or not. I remember them telling me it was going to take him a little bit to get down to the room once he was paged, but honestly, it felt like he was there almost immediately. When he did the epidural (with me laying on my side, yay!), Suzanne was with me, and Carol Ann and Andrew were required to leave the room, of course. There was relief almost immediately. Now, I don't know if the epidural just didn't take completely, or if it worked kind of perfectly, or what, because everyone has different stories of the feelings associated with the epidural, but let me just say, I LOVED my epidural. All it did was knock out the majority of the back labor. Everything else, I could feel. I felt contractions, I felt my legs and toes and had pretty good control over them, I could feel my legs, etc, being touched. Some people want to feel completely numb with an epidural, but this was actually one of my fears -- that I'd be so numb, I wouldn't be able to give birth. But for me, it worked out perfectly. Something else I think is cool is the fact that Dr. Bush was working that day (she only works the dr’s office certain days) AND she happened to be on call that night. So when office hours were over, she came to my room and pretty much just hung out with us during a lot of my labor. Its pretty rare to get to have that happen, and especially to have it work out where your dr. happens to end up being the one on-call. I really love Dr. Bush, so this was great for me. Back to the epi- Andrew thinks I got the epi. around 9 PM. Its like having the epidural "unstalled" my progress and allowed my body to relax enough to finish dilating. I am very blessed to have had it work out this way. I was able to talk during contractions and even talked on the phone during the end of labor! I was able to catch my breath before the big finish. I didn’t sleep or doze or anything, I just wasn’t getting exhausted with each contraction. Then it was time for Oliver to come out. I honestly don’t remember being told the time had come. I just remember it was somehow time, and the room filled with about 12 people (no I’m not kidding), and it was lights (dropping out of the ceiling), cameras (after he was born), and action. Yes, I was thankful for the epidural, but as I stated, I could still feel everything. So it was still very painful. I just didn’t have the all-encompassing back-labor like I’d had. I’ll skip all the details of this whole part (I’m sure you’re glad). Finally, he was born at 11:26 PM that same night. Funny thing, friends and family guessed his due date about 3-4 weeks before he was due, and Andrew guessed his due date correctly! Even though he was born 9 days early! Pretty cool. I remember looking at the clock between pushes and thinking if I didn’t hurry things up, Laine would be the correct due-date guesser, not Andrew. Ha. So he was born, and it was wonderful. Everyone said my belly never looked as huge as one would expect, and the sonographer guessed he was in the 40th %tile, but let me tell you, this little boy came out shocking ALL of us in the room, being 8 lbs and 4 ounces NINE DAYS before his due date. Yikes! We were all like, “WHAT?!” What a big boy he ended up being, the little trickster! I thought I would cry when he was born, but I didn’t at all, which really surprised me. I thought Andrew would cry, too, but he didn’t – although he says he got teary eyed. So they got him mostly cleaned off and put a dipe on him and his bracelets and wrapped him in a blanket and I got to nurse him when he was just minutes old. What a precious thing how God has worked it out to be so. It is amazing, with the help of our doula, she had us unwrap his blanket so he was skin to skin with me, we layed him vertical in the middle of my belly and chest, and he literally wiggled like a worm toward his food source! How amazing that a newborn baby has an instinct put in them by God to do such a thing! It was so sweet and just plain incredible. Then Andrew got to hold his son for the first time – the first baby he had EVER held. It was wonderful to watch him hold our baby for the first time! Within probably 30 mins or so, I was able to walk to the bathroom. Did I mention how fantastic I think my epidural experience was? Such a blessing. We had previously put in for a private transition (the first 4 hrs after birth, baby is closely monitored and has some routine things done, which is normally done in the nursery), so we had an incredible private transition nurse in our room with us doing all the normal things with Oliver so we could stay together. It was FANTASTIC. We got several great video clips of this. Within 1.5 – 2.5 hours, I’d say, Mom and Bubby showed up (between mom, dad and bub, there were 2 vehicles, and dad drove straight to Tchula to our house to hold down the fort and check on the power – it was still out!!!). You’ve never seen such an excited and proud Grandma and Uncle!!!! It was neat to get to have them there so soon after he was born, while we were still in the Labor/Delivery room and they were still doing private transition with Oliver. An hour or so later, I got moved to my post-partum room, and Oliver was taken to the nursery for the final wrap up of things. He was returned to my room about an hour later. It worked out so well. I’m so thankful we had the option of requesting a private transition so baby didn’t have to be away for so long! We roomed in the whole time (this was important to me, I know a lot of people think this is nuts). I literally slept maybe ½ hour that night (for various reasons). Thursday was full of the usual stuff – visitors, paperwork, seeing lots of drs and nurses checking on me and Oliver and telling us stuff – and we left for home Friday afternoon.

Dad and Bubby stayed just under a week and mom ended up staying one day short of 3 weeks. She was going to stay 2 weeks, but I was so exhausted and non-functioning she stayed an extra week. I seriously don’t know what I would have done without her. We also were provided meals every few days or so for better than a couple weeks by church members. Also, so wonderful. When Oliver was 2 weeks old, I found out we both had Thrush and I had staff infection from nursing (this was horrific). We found this out after finally going to the MS Breastfeeding Medical Clinic (I pretty much love them up there, now…I wouldn’t still be nursing if it weren’t for them). These infections were probably contributing greatly to some of the extreme exhaustion I was feeling, since I was in such severe pain, Oliver was in pain from having the infection, and was consequently not sleeping hardly at all, so neither was I, etc etc, etc and we didn’t know something was truly wrong with us until he was 16 days old and saw Dr. Saenz. I am actually still battling problems with it, would you believe that? I’ve taken antibiotics and done all sorts of things, and so has Oliver. But NOTHING like it was at first. I am nearly healed up, its just taking forever (I hear this is normal for such infections). At the height of the infections/pain/before/right after going to the doctor, it was so bad, I felt like I was going to pass out sometimes and I’d scream and cry my eyes out and totally freak out when I nursed. It was REALLY bad. I know it was God sustaining me through that, because there is no way I could have handled that from my own will. I am SO thankful for the Breastfeeding Clinic and the ministry (I see it as this) they have to women to help them with related issues.

Ok, so first three weeks were pretty much ridiculously rough, and I was beyond exhausted. First two months, I couldn’t get anything done hardly because I’d barely get started on something and Oliver would need to be held, or else he’d cry like a banshee – (I’m not talking just fussy, I’m talking, no one in their right mind would let their kid cry like this). So I held him a lot. And got hardly anything done. But that’s ok. Traci came and cleaned one time while I took a nap with Oliver. It was glorious. I could kiss her feet. She’d be totally grossed out if she knows I said that. Hee hee. Debra (Andrew’s mom) came to visit when he was 5-6 weeks old. She helped a lot. She stayed for 2 weeks. Then Melissa (Andrew’s sister) came for a week right before he turned 2 months old. She helped a lot, too. Then, he turned 2 months old, and it was like a switch was flipped and he was a lot more content, and I was able to start getting things done in better chunks. Its still not easy, and he has worse days than others, of course…but….its much better, now.

This is fun (not): we found out Oliver is highly allergic to baby wipes, after not knowing what was causing the yeast infections and chemical burns (literally, chemical burns) on his bottom, we finally figured it out after a few weeks of him having the problem and trying 5 or 6 prescriptions….I feel HORRIBLE that every time I changed his diaper and wiped his little bottom with a diaper wipe, I was making it worse instead of better. It only got better when Debra was here and she suggested using just water on washcloths since the wipes would probably not feel as good as just water and cloth, not suggesting it because she thought he was allergic to the wipes (I guess my mom had suggested stopping the wipes way back, and I dismissed it absentmindedly since we were using they hypoallergenic/sensitive/dermatologist recommended/alchy-free wipes). So we used washrags for about a week during one of the prescription diaper creams, and it cleared up completely! So I thought it was the prescription that worked! So I started using wipes again, and do you know the yeast infection started coming back?! So I KNEW it has to be the wipes-hes allergic to all those chemicals! So now we use only water on washrags and you have never seen a healthier baby bottom! Amazing! Poor little guy! Oh, my heart breaks to think what I was doing to him! Then, a week or 2 ago, I suspected he was allergic, also, to babh wash, since a little bumpy rash he’d had for weeks at the top of his back started to spread and get worse and start to look a little like the yeast infection when it had begun on his rear end. So then went my hunt for something super sensitive and chemical-free to bathe him with. Enter California Baby Products. Oh wow, I am such a fan, now. This little guy, with the most sensitive skin on the planet is doing great with the Cali. Baby wash/shampoo! So THANKFUL!!!! Aaaaannnd…just realized he must also be allergic to sunscreen (your run of the mill kind with the usual chemicals), so I plan to pick up some Cali. Baby sunscreen soon, as well to try it on him.

So, In my run down of the (almost) first three months of his life, I’ve mentioned all the bad things, just to let you know what has been adding to the craziness…But our precious baby boy, this gift from God is so so so worth it, and we have had such sweet times enjoying our baby. We love him so much. So don’t think I’m all depressed or something. Just wanted to let you know what has been up, so to speak.

Lets see. He is thriving and growing very well. He is big and tall for his age (shocking to me, since Andrew nor I are particularly tall or big). Hes now wearing mostly 3-6 m. clothes, with a few flat out 6 m. pieces and a few 0-3 m. pieces that still fit him. He grows out of things so fast. Its amazing. He’s got to weigh close to 14 lbs now.

Other fun highlights:
He smiled at 6 weeks. We had a family photoshoot with Erin Fults when he was 7 weeks. He loves to stare at ceiling air vents and fans. Hehe. He smiles at me when I come to his crib or when he sees us for the first time after a nap or after “playing” by himself for a while. he loves looking at his “friends” on his swing mobile – they make him laugh. He is just so stinkin cute.

Pictures to follow. Ha. Maybe. Someday.